The Secret

Pssst.  Wanna know a secret?  By nature, people, like cats, are naturally curious.  We all want to be in on a secret.  To be in the know.  Thing is, it’s not really a secret if everybody knows about it.  Is it?  So, by definition , a secret has a limited audience.

Some folks are not very good about keeping a secret.  They blab it to everyone and it moves into the realm of gossip.  True or not.  Others take this a little further toward meanness.  It becomes blackmail.  Keep me happy and I’ll keep your secret.

Secrets can big good or bad, big or little, important and trivial.  But what’s on my mind today is a special kind of secret.  One of those where you know something about someone before they know it themselves.  Not yet anyway.  They’ll find out soon enough.

Being privy to that kind of secret makes me giddy when it’s good news.  I know something you don’t.  Nah, nah.  I want to tell, but am sworn to secrecy lest I become a gossip.  Your parents are taking you to Disneyland!  But then again, not all secrets are good.

It makes me sad when there is something bad involved.  More than helpless.  Like watching a train wreck in slow motion.  If your doctor knows you have a terrible disease but hasn’t told you yet, it’s not really a secret.  She just hasn’t gotten a chance to tell you.  That’s different form what I’m talking about.  Sometimes what you know will make someone very unhappy when they find out.  You don’t really want to tell them.  No one wants to be the bearer of bad news.  And you couldn’t tell them anyway.  Sworn to secrecy you know.

You look at the person knowing that the stuff is going to hit their fan very shortly.  You smile and converse as if nothing is happening.  No worries.  How can I be so fake?  Do they see through me?  How can they look so calm.  Unconcerned.  Unknowing.  If I let on, the secret is out.  Not today.

They say knowledge is power.  Not today.  Curiosity killed the cat.  I just wish I didn’t know.

 

That’s part of my story.  What’s yours?  www.personalhistorywriter.com

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